Trusting your truth

step in water
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Where does your truth live in your body?

This may sound like a weird question but it is not. In our everyday language we regularly refer to our “gut feeling” when we sense that we need to do something.  There is an increasing number of research that shows how various parts of the body (such as the gut, heart, skin and vagus nerve) acts as brains of their own, process information and make decisions before we are even cognitively aware of it. Highlighting the importance of being able to connect and sense into the wisdom of the body. The psychiatrist, Bessel van der Kolk, say that you have to be in your body to speak your truth.

Over the years of working with people in a personal development capacity I came to realise that this is a difficult question for people to answer.  People tend to be good at identifying when someone else is speaking “the truth” (or not). However, when it comes to knowing what is true for them personally and being able to stand in their truth, they are not as skilled. The catch is that if you want to bring your “whole self” to life, you need to be able to embody all of you.

What is true for you may not be true for someone else. Therefore, asking advice may help in discerning what is more aligned to your truth but it is not enough. Building the capacity to know where your truth lives in your body means sensing into your body. Really tuning into the felt sense of when you do (or don’t do) things. Observing where in your body do you feel moved (or movement) when you read a poem or listen to a piece of music that speaks to you.

Your truth lives in your body. Your thoughts can confuse you by spinning various stories but when you can connect to your truth and trust it.  That gives you the courage to move forward in life in the face of uncertainty. In acting (applying for the job, buying the flight ticket, making the decision, speaking up in the meeting, etc.) on that inner wisdom you open yourself to new experiences that can then in return provide “evidence” of why trusting your truth was “the right thing” for you to do.  This creates a feedback loop that builds your capacity to direct your life from an embodied stance.

 

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You are a swan

swan

We all have a different relationship with our bodies. For some it’s a love-hate relationship and others struggle to look in the mirror. I still remember the first time I was told to rather wear a certain type of pants because it makes my thighs look thinner. There were (and sometimes still are) times when I look in the mirror and wished I had a beautiful skin. I can recall a time in my teenage years at school when all the girls were weighed. After that a scale changed from a measuring instrument to a judge. My relationship with my body changed from a wonderful vehicle that allowed me to participate in sport, run around and experience life to something that is rejected and not ‘thin enough’ or ‘the right size’.

In the book “ Women, Food and God” Geneen Roth accurately writes: ‘ It’s never been true, not anywhere at any time that the value of a soul, of a human spirit, is dependent on a number on a scale. When we start defining ourselves by that which can be measured or weighed, something deep inside us rebels’. I believe this is true and applicable to different aspects of our lives not just weight.

Through my journey with my body I learned that the more I let go of expectations and accept the wonderful gift of a body that was given to me. The more I was able to engage with others and the world in an authentic, meaningful and sustainable way. My energy was not focused on rejecting parts of me but rather on allowing all of me to be. This shift of focus enabled me to use the wisdom of my body to engage fully in life and not wait till self-created conditions were met (such as being a certain weight or having the perfect skin) before I can start to enjoy life.

If you look in a non-judging and loving way at yourself you will find that you are (and always have been) a swan and not an ugly duckling. That in not accepting part of your body you are denying your true story. You begin to see the true beauty of your own inner nature. You learn to love your ‘imperfections’ as they are what make you authentic.

Learning: I’m already a swan as I am now.

 Healing question: How can I love and accept all of me as I am now?