Do you have an ideal picture of your life, partner, job, children or even how you want your body to look like? It is exactly these ideal images that can create suffering if it blinds other ways of looking and experiencing the world for us. I recently learned the hard way how I was still holding on too tightly to an old belief of how my CV must look like for me to get the ideal job. In doing that I created my own straight jacket. When I realised that I was creating my own suffering by my way of thinking, I also realised that I have the power to loosen the buckles of the straight jacket. I can set myself free in letting go of the picture I had in my mind.
This reminded me of what Mary Parker Follet wrote about purpose in the 1920’s in a business management book:
“Last summer I noticed a strange plant in our pasture. I did not know what it was, I had no picture in my mind of what flower or fruit it would bear, but I freed it. That is, I dug around it and opened the soil that the rain might fall on its roots, I cleared out the thistles with which it was entangled so that it might have room to spread, I cut down the undergrowth of small maples near so that it could get the sun. In other words, I simply freed it. Every friendship which is not treated in this way will surely suffer; no human relation should serve an anticipatory purpose. Every relation should be a freeing relation with the “purpose” evolving.”
What pictures, that serve an anticipatory purpose, are causing suffering in your relationships or life?
Let go of the pictures, unbuckle yourself and set yourself free to evolve into more than you can imagine.